Welcome to Lily Pond!
At Lily Pond, I write about topics at the intersection of mental health, physical health, spirituality, and the immigrant experience.
I’m an immigrant daughter who grew up with a mountain of responsibilities shoved on my shoulders, and a bucket of guilt attached to my role as “the good daughter.” The collectivist Chinese culture I was raised in clashed with the individualistic culture I adapted to as my family migrated to the United States.
It’s been my life-long quest to make sense of these cross-cultural identity clashes and to overcome self-hatred as a result of internalized racism. I’m also actively breaking the cycle of intergenerational trauma, and making connections with folks who share a similar path. Could that be you?
On this healing journey, may the sadness in me greet the sadness in you with dignity and compassion. I hope that through my personal experience, you will find glimpses of insights and growth that fuel your own journey to heal from past trauma and discover your true self.
This space chronicles my journey of healing from the profound impacts of ancestral trauma, cultural adaptation and complex trauma, and the resulting self-discovery and spiritual growth.
Lily Pond is a weekly newsletter for all who are experiencing mental health challenges while going through major life transitions, such as a midlife crisis. It is especially for adult daughters of immigrants looking for inspirations for self compassion and soul care.
Subscription to Lily Pond will allow you to:
feel heard and seen for your unexpressed mental health struggles;
participate in meaningful discussions on how your culture and family dynamics affect your well-being;
get recommendations on books, films, songs, TV, creative works, and mental health resources; and
and get inspired to go on your own healing journey.
All subscribers will get:
access to some of my current and all of the public posts (up to 3 months old) in your inbox, on the Substack app or on my Substack site. Newsletters are generally published once a week.
Paid subscribers will be able to:
have access to all of my current and archived newsletters, including topics that are most personal and sensitive in nature;
post comments and interact with other subscribers on all newsletters, including the ones behind the paywall;
join community events such as Chats and Q&As with me;
have access to expert interviews/podcasts.
Disclaimer:
I’m not a medical or mental health professional. My opinions should not be interpreted as or replace medical advice.
More about me:
My family and I moved from mainland China to Hong Kong and the United States during my childhood. I later also migrated to Sweden for a few years.
As a first-generation Chinese American, my world straddles two very different cultures. I often find myself an outsider looking in, seeing conflicting parts of our cultural conditionings with an inquisitive mind.
My goal is to break the vicious cycle of intergenerational and intercultural trauma and family dysfunction specific to Chinese immigrants living in the West. Through reparenting and reconstructing my relationship with myself and the world, I aim to live a life true to myself despite all that I went through.
Thanks to my migration experiences, I can speak multiple languages — English, Cantonese, Mandarin, Swedish, and French. When I become really really old, the only language (dialect, to be precise) that I’d probably be able to remember is Hangzhouese!
I’ve worked as a reporter and editor for nearly 30 years, with a dozen other odd and interesting jobs sprinkled in between. I also helped people transform their health and wellness through my coaching practice in the past seven years. Today, I’m focused on helping myself and others who have experienced childhood and complex trauma to make sense of our common suffering, to grow emotionally and to make progress in personal healing.
I love art in all forms, especially painting, photography, and ballet.
As I’ve passed the midpoint of my life, I’m trying to embrace getting a little older and wiser every day.
